"There are moments in this life
When you can't fake it." - Do Not Let Me Go by Joshua Hyslop.
This post isn't going to be a sad one. I am tired of showing that side of myself to you all. I promise you I am a very happy person. I have always had very many reasons to be happy. I am planning on tell you some of those reasons right now.
One of the biggest reasons I am happy, if not the biggest reason, is because of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and the gospel doctrine it teaches me. My testimony of my Father in Heaven is my beacon in the dark, He's the reason I am living. Today is a day that we fast for something, fasting is just a little extra help from Heavenly Father. The point of it is to essentially "starve" the natural man in us all to make more room for our souls to thrive and gain more insight from our loving Father. I believe that everything else that I list is because of this first one. I know that Christ died for me, so that I could have the happiness my soul so craved in the pre-mortal life.
Now that I have said why these beautiful additions are in my life I can say who they are, my family. Words cannot express the many feelings I feel for each member of my family. Not only my immediate family, but everyone, my grandma, cousins, great grandparents, and so on. They all have made some choice that one way or another has impacted my life and for that I am very grateful to them for helping me make it a good one, for their persistence, mostly though for my immediate family, for my little sissy, for the things I have learned from and about her and will learn. I'm grateful for her amazing personality in my life. Also for the love that she has for me and I have for her, it made my junior and senior years of high school full of light. For my oldest brother, Bo-bo, although you have been gone for it seems like decades Bo, I still remember your silly attitude, crazy temper (at times), and love for fun, your family, and doing what was right and good. Thank you for your love. Thank you for working so hard where you are. We can feel it Bo, we really can. And we miss you. For Tanner. my older brother, he just recently became engaged, I am thrilled for him and his finace. Tan, you did it brother, as much as I thought at times, there was going to have to be a miracle for you to choose a wife, I see now, it was just that. And that love is truly a miracle for anyone. You my brother are a miracle after all the near death experiences you've had and the times when I thought you had given up on this gem we call love, you go to china looking for just that, you seemed like you were digging deep bro, I hope that you found what you were looking for. It seems you have, I hope that you and I become close again. I miss you.
Mom, well honestly there is nothing I can express in mere words that tells you all how much love our mother has for the children she has bore, raised, and molded. Everyday I am who I am because of the childhood my mother provided, for the pure and sweet love my mother shows me, for the attitude she has in hard times, for the beacon she is to many people around her. She is the closest person I know to superwomen and I imagine she wouldn't agree with that statement, but that is what we call humility. I love you momma. Papa, for every family member there is definitely a different love, a different feel for them, but for my dad, it is entirely different. My father is a man that shows love more abundantly in such interesting ways, he loves his wife, very much. He is trying his hardest to show that love and act on it as well, he loves his children, each one of them with a specific love that he has developed over the years of giving his all to provide for us each day. My dad and I's relationship is always developing every time I call, think of him, and by the things I try to do for him. I love my daddy. Heavenly Father definitely knew what he was doing when He gave me the parents He did.
Quickly want to mention some friends, Courtney, Caitlin, Katelyn, Geoffery Brown, Brittnay Teare, Bekah, Becca Robinson. One way or another all these people have not only touched my life, but altered it recently, life is an amazing ride when you keep changing seats and meeting the most amazing souls. These souls are just that.
Honestly, I know for a fact that these next few words aren't going to come close to the things I have felt these past few months, and year with him. Now for the sappy love part, brace yourselves. David Clifton Hartshorn. This man is the closest person I have to a real angel. I imagine that in the beginning God saw all the good things that I have done up to my life and combined them to get someone who was half the man David is. I guess the other half I have gained is because of the mercy of my loving Father. David's influence on me is life changing. I know that they are directly from my Father in Heaven and that is why it is so close to the core of my very being. I believe the line in Les Miserables to be true: "To love someone, is to see the face of God" This rings true to my heart these last couple months. The first time I saw David after the true separation we had, I felt like I did the first time I truly saw David's sou. A couple nights ago we were driving to my grandparents grave just to talk and check in with each other, when while we were driving, I felt a distinct voice tell me, "Chelsea, you truly do love him unconditionally." I looked back at him and remember thinking, it begins. I was completely full. I was completely and utterly full of a love that I have never experienced for another human being, it was beautifully perfect. The crazy thing about life is that we have those moments. Moments of bewitchment, and then the next there is some opposition. In that moment I knew there was also going to be opposition for this feeling. I wished more than anything for it to not come, pleaded, but to no avail. Opposition came, but the thing about it is that at the end of those hard, long, weeks is sunday. The day of the Lord and David and I know that God is the one who allows all of these to happen, and we know that the love will return when we are trying. And it did the next morning we were making breakfast and he was being so funny and perfect that I remembered that love. I remembered why I was on this earth. I have never had more moments with someone in my existence on this earth. I plan on enduring, living and loving with David by my side. It makes me life worth it. I can't imagine it any other way now.
So! Now that we all know what I am thinking again. I hope everyone who reads this knows of the happiness of my soul, and that is truly from the Atonement of Christ. I am thankful everyday for it, and Him. And my David.
When you can't fake it." - Do Not Let Me Go by Joshua Hyslop.
This post isn't going to be a sad one. I am tired of showing that side of myself to you all. I promise you I am a very happy person. I have always had very many reasons to be happy. I am planning on tell you some of those reasons right now.
One of the biggest reasons I am happy, if not the biggest reason, is because of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and the gospel doctrine it teaches me. My testimony of my Father in Heaven is my beacon in the dark, He's the reason I am living. Today is a day that we fast for something, fasting is just a little extra help from Heavenly Father. The point of it is to essentially "starve" the natural man in us all to make more room for our souls to thrive and gain more insight from our loving Father. I believe that everything else that I list is because of this first one. I know that Christ died for me, so that I could have the happiness my soul so craved in the pre-mortal life.
Now that I have said why these beautiful additions are in my life I can say who they are, my family. Words cannot express the many feelings I feel for each member of my family. Not only my immediate family, but everyone, my grandma, cousins, great grandparents, and so on. They all have made some choice that one way or another has impacted my life and for that I am very grateful to them for helping me make it a good one, for their persistence, mostly though for my immediate family, for my little sissy, for the things I have learned from and about her and will learn. I'm grateful for her amazing personality in my life. Also for the love that she has for me and I have for her, it made my junior and senior years of high school full of light. For my oldest brother, Bo-bo, although you have been gone for it seems like decades Bo, I still remember your silly attitude, crazy temper (at times), and love for fun, your family, and doing what was right and good. Thank you for your love. Thank you for working so hard where you are. We can feel it Bo, we really can. And we miss you. For Tanner. my older brother, he just recently became engaged, I am thrilled for him and his finace. Tan, you did it brother, as much as I thought at times, there was going to have to be a miracle for you to choose a wife, I see now, it was just that. And that love is truly a miracle for anyone. You my brother are a miracle after all the near death experiences you've had and the times when I thought you had given up on this gem we call love, you go to china looking for just that, you seemed like you were digging deep bro, I hope that you found what you were looking for. It seems you have, I hope that you and I become close again. I miss you.
Mom, well honestly there is nothing I can express in mere words that tells you all how much love our mother has for the children she has bore, raised, and molded. Everyday I am who I am because of the childhood my mother provided, for the pure and sweet love my mother shows me, for the attitude she has in hard times, for the beacon she is to many people around her. She is the closest person I know to superwomen and I imagine she wouldn't agree with that statement, but that is what we call humility. I love you momma. Papa, for every family member there is definitely a different love, a different feel for them, but for my dad, it is entirely different. My father is a man that shows love more abundantly in such interesting ways, he loves his wife, very much. He is trying his hardest to show that love and act on it as well, he loves his children, each one of them with a specific love that he has developed over the years of giving his all to provide for us each day. My dad and I's relationship is always developing every time I call, think of him, and by the things I try to do for him. I love my daddy. Heavenly Father definitely knew what he was doing when He gave me the parents He did.
Quickly want to mention some friends, Courtney, Caitlin, Katelyn, Geoffery Brown, Brittnay Teare, Bekah, Becca Robinson. One way or another all these people have not only touched my life, but altered it recently, life is an amazing ride when you keep changing seats and meeting the most amazing souls. These souls are just that.
Honestly, I know for a fact that these next few words aren't going to come close to the things I have felt these past few months, and year with him. Now for the sappy love part, brace yourselves. David Clifton Hartshorn. This man is the closest person I have to a real angel. I imagine that in the beginning God saw all the good things that I have done up to my life and combined them to get someone who was half the man David is. I guess the other half I have gained is because of the mercy of my loving Father. David's influence on me is life changing. I know that they are directly from my Father in Heaven and that is why it is so close to the core of my very being. I believe the line in Les Miserables to be true: "To love someone, is to see the face of God" This rings true to my heart these last couple months. The first time I saw David after the true separation we had, I felt like I did the first time I truly saw David's sou. A couple nights ago we were driving to my grandparents grave just to talk and check in with each other, when while we were driving, I felt a distinct voice tell me, "Chelsea, you truly do love him unconditionally." I looked back at him and remember thinking, it begins. I was completely full. I was completely and utterly full of a love that I have never experienced for another human being, it was beautifully perfect. The crazy thing about life is that we have those moments. Moments of bewitchment, and then the next there is some opposition. In that moment I knew there was also going to be opposition for this feeling. I wished more than anything for it to not come, pleaded, but to no avail. Opposition came, but the thing about it is that at the end of those hard, long, weeks is sunday. The day of the Lord and David and I know that God is the one who allows all of these to happen, and we know that the love will return when we are trying. And it did the next morning we were making breakfast and he was being so funny and perfect that I remembered that love. I remembered why I was on this earth. I have never had more moments with someone in my existence on this earth. I plan on enduring, living and loving with David by my side. It makes me life worth it. I can't imagine it any other way now.
So! Now that we all know what I am thinking again. I hope everyone who reads this knows of the happiness of my soul, and that is truly from the Atonement of Christ. I am thankful everyday for it, and Him. And my David.
