You know that icky feeling you get when you have had a fever and then it breaks and since you were so cold before you had put on all the blankets and such so your sitting there sweating profusely and you are so freaking tired that you don't want to take off the blankets so you just try and get some rest, but your so hot that you can't do anything so eventually you get up enough strength to take the blankets off, or you just had to go to the bathroom. Well I hate that feeling. And it hasn't happened to me in a while, and I have no idea why I brought it up but I just hate it. And I wanted to make you think about how happy you are that is not happening to you right now. And if it is...I'm really sorry. That sucks.
Ok, onto a more happier note, I got to go Utah, My haven, this weekend and I absolutely loved it. It gives me hope to go on with my life when I go there. But also there are things there that discourage me..but isn't that how it is everywhere? but lets not dwindle on the bad but let us focus on the GOOD! So, I got to hang out with David, Bryan and My brother Tanner. They all live up in Idaho but came down for the weekend to hang with me. And it was a blast. They are probably the funniest, coolest, most legit people I know. And I needed to hang out with them this weekend. They were just what I needed. I am not fully ready yet, but I am getting close.
Ok, so I have a story, my mom and I were talking about it on the way home tonight actually. So you know when you have those dreams that seem so real at the time and even when you wake up it takes you a couple hours to get back into the mode you were in when you went to bed? Well, I had one of those dreams, now mind you it was a wonderful dream, but it was something that really did NOT needed to be brought up at this time. It was actually last night that this magnificent dream happened. I dreamed that I was back with my ex, and I was probably the happiest I had been in a looong time. But when I woke up I was thinking to myself how lucky I was to be with someone like Nicklas and if he would call today or if I should call him and leave him a cute voicemail and all this freakin crap! It wasn't until I was in the shower and I realized oh...ohh...ohhh my gosh! (not singing the song). And I just sat there for a minute first of all thinking how mean that was for my brain to do that to me. Second of all I was thinking I am happy now, there really is no need for me to be sad about something in the past. There is a part in Kung Fu Panda when the turtle (whom I love!). Says, "Yesterday was history, tomorrow is a mystery but todaaaaay is a gift. That is why its is called the present." I love that quote because it is oh so very true. While my mom and I were in Utah we went shopping at this really cool village thing and found another quote there by Abraham Lincoln (Good ole' Abe), it was on a little plaque thing and my mom bought it for me but it says "I will prepare myself and someday my time will come." Such wisdom in that man. We all need to just prepare..that is what we do all our lives anyway. and either we take our shot or we miss it. So be prepared guys lets make our difference! Till tomorrow
By the way I know I missed but I figured I can miss two every three months. Sound fair? oaky doaky!
